EXT. Texas Preacher Sues Jewish Group for Copyright Infringement - TWILIGHT
A fundamentalist preacher whose father died leaving him a lucrative bible publishing business has filed a copyright infringement lawsuit against the Jewish Reform Movement. "When I started to read passages from their
Modern English Translation of the Torah, I got a sickening feeling in my stomach," said Pastor Brightman, "as I encountered page after page of text substantially similar to the Old Testament of my daddy's bible. They have simply copied our book and claimed it to be a new work by a Jewish reformer."
The Jewish community, represented by the firm of Rosenblum and Rodriguez, have counter-sued: claiming Brightman is not anti-semitic, but brain-damaged and in need of care. Judge Goldstein remanded Brightman to the custody of Dr. Levinstein-Kawasaki of the Cedars-Sinai Mental Ward in Los Angeles, California for a full psychological examination.
A plume of purple haze was seen emanating from the special chimney above the Vatican, indicating the Pope agrees with Judge Goldstein.
Pastor Brightman is currently undergoing a "minor corrective vasectomy to prevent permanent brain damage to his children" - in the event that he should seek to have any - after a routine biopsy revealed he had the intellectual capacity of a common teaspoon. "Most people afflicted with this particular genetic disorder suffer from debilitating hallucinations in which the Arab people are seen as global terrorists and a threat to the American way of life," explained Dr. Levinstein-Kawasaki.
Labels: satire
